Stop with the judging

 For the love of God, can we please quit pointing our damn fingers?!

Guess who you have control over? YOURSELF. That’s it. Literally. I don’t even have “control” over my 19 month old twins – because they are human beings with their own thoughts and emotions. I can steer them as best I can to be good people. I can raise them to be kind and loving and to do their best. But I cannot control them. I cannot change their actions. I cannot make every decision for them – even as 19 month olds (have you tried to dress a toddler who doesn’t want to be dressed in that moment???) What I can do is set the best example possible. I can work on myself. I can show them how to care for others. I can use kind words when talking to and about people. We are all individual people. We are all entitled to our own opinions. And those opinions are going to differ from time to time. And that’s okay.

Stop blaming others for issues in the world. I’m so damn tired of seeing people make broad statements about entire groups of people. Whether that be political party, economic status, color, race, religion. Just because you identify with a “group” of people (whether by choice or if you were born into that group) does not mean you are exactly like everyone else in that group. So what entitles any of us to judge? And why are we spending so much time and energy spreading hate? The first step to making our world a better place? Make yourself a better person. WORK. ON. YOURSELF. Try to see different opinions and understand them. Ask someone for their honest thoughts and truly listen. You don’t have to like what they say, and you definitely don’t have to agree with them. But by listening and understanding why another person feels the way they do, we become better people. We become more compassionate – and I believe smarter. Even if you walk away from that conversation thinking, “well that’s exactly the opposite of the way I want to treat others” – then you learned a lesson from it. 

Yes, there are terrible things happening in the world right now. Yes, we’re all frustrated and over it and just want things to be “back to normal”. But do we really? I believe we’re being given a unique opportunity to stop and learn from others. To listen, and to put in the work to make ourselves better people.

So please, next time you want to comment about what others are doing or make a bold statement about an entire group of people – stop and think how you can truly help in that situation. What can you do to make this world better? I can guarantee the answer is not spreading hate. It has to start with you. Make yourself better. Because every single one of us has room for growth. Always.